


strange bedfellows

by Zoanzon



Series: Fragments of Larger Worlds [4]
Category: Magic: The Gathering, War of the Spark - Fandom
Genre: (for now it's pre-relationship; that'll change in further chapters), F/M, I was looking at the most recent day of WAR spoilers and my mind did a funny thig, Ravnica, War of the Spark, and by funny I mean insane, and everyone else is terrified of their relationship which makes no sense, this trope is: murder-bunny annoys tired lawyer until he shuts her up (with his mouth)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 10:44:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18364427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zoanzon/pseuds/Zoanzon
Summary: It's been weeks since the portal opened and the Dreadhorde came through, weeks since he'd taken to hiding in the basement of an abandoned building to try and plot out the movements of the enemy, and days since he'd slept. Now, he has a notorious assassin dropping in constantly yet not trying to kill him (after that first attempt at least), a way to deal with the people collaborating with the invaders, and someone to speak to that's not his corkboards.(Or: Tomik utilizes an unexpected resource, Massacre Girl is fine with being pointed at targets so long as she can poke at the tired and snarky lawmage, and everyone else close enough to see this dynamic grow is confused and horrified.)





	strange bedfellows

**Author's Note:**

> The hell is this? The answer is simple: _god only knows_.
> 
> When looking at the newest MTG spoilers, I saw the flavor text on one card read _"I never liked you. Now get up - we have a fight to finish."_ , then I saw the cards for [Tomik, Distinguished Advokist](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D3ZYleUW0AEXgup.png) and [Massacre Girl](https://img.scryfall.com/cards/large/front/b/e/be8ec9e1-2c8e-496d-9111-4d453b75b578.jpg?1554463425) having been released back-to-back. I saw that, and my mind was stuck on that quote, and from that came...this.
> 
> In which a tired lawmage utilizes the unexpected asset at his disposal (read: somehow ends up with a murderer and assassin willing to take requests, and rolls with it), a notorious murderer starts working for the resistance (read: is curious how long the should-be-squeaky-clean yet surprisingly-snarky lawmage will keep giving her targets, and enjoys how he reacts to her giving him shit or flirting with him), and everyone else who sees them interact together is confused and mildly horrified.

Tomik first realized he was not alone just in time to keep himself from being stabbed in the back.

Hurridly throwing himself out of the way, rolling on the floor to try and come up on his feet — it worked, but only because he bumped into the wall and used it as a support — and see how the Dreadhoarde had gotten in, but instead found an even more terrifying sight in front of him.

A girl - young woman - around his age, black hair with the sides shaved off. The clothing she was wearing under her armor had a jester-like red and blue diamond pattern on the arms and legs, a bloody pattern — with what might be _actual blood_ — was on her face, and she was holding a knife just a step away from where he’d been standing.

Massacre Girl.

Tomik very carefully kept from hyperventilating.

“Well,” she said, dragging his attention back with a surprisingly perky voice, “those were some good reflexes! Wouldn’t have expected that from one of you lawmages.”

“Why are you here,” Tomik said after a moment, hand very slowly moving on the side she couldn’t see.

Massacre Girl raised an eyebrow very exaggeratedly, then looked at the knife in her hand and then at him.

He let out a scoff in disgust, seeing out of his half-slitted eyes her _move_ —

—just in time for his hand-motion to stop, conjuring golden ethereal chains to bind her. With a moment’s of concentration, Tomik shifted the chains to spread her like an X, dangling a foot off the floor.

“Ohhh,” Massacre Girl said, eyes wide, before they suddenly narrowed. “Naughty, naughty. I thought you Azorius didn’t go for things like whips and chains.”

Tomik blinked in incomprehension for a moment before violently blushing, a cackling laugh from his surprise gue- captive letting him know she’d seen it.

“Fine, I’ll rephrase,” Tomik said after a moment’s pause, deciding to ignore the past few moments. “Why are you here, killing _me_?”

Massacre Girl let out a low hum, shifting slightly in the chains in a way that made him want to avert his eyes (but, considering her sneak-attack the last time, didn’t) and cocking her head slightly.

“It’s very, very rare for someone to be able to capture me,” she said apropos of nothing. “And this doesn’t look like the usual lawmage bindings. Yet another new teaching from the Azorius’ new leader?”

Tomik paused, then let out a deep sigh. “You answer mine, and I’ll answer yours.”

Massacre Girl blinked, then grinned. “Deal. Now, you first.”

He shot her a scowl, but spoke. “It wasn’t from Guildmaster Baan. My father was also Azorius, and he tutored up-and-coming lawmages and arresters; when I joined, one of his former students took me under her wing and taught me in turn.” Aunt Lavinia likely had not been expecting these circumstances. “The chains themselves were inspired by one of the figures fighting the Dreadhorde, who used similar chains once or twice.” That figure had also been in association with the Guildpact and his aunt had had contact with him in the weeks and months before Ravnica had turned upside down and told him of the ‘hieromancer’s’ chains having certain repressive qualities, but his ‘guest’ didn’t need to know that either. “Now, you; why?”

The black-haired girl giggled, a somewhat disturbing — if not unusual — sight from someone in Rakdos garb. “My my, an actual imagination and creativity; are you sure you’re Azorius?” She grinned at his scowl. “Well, after _Guildmaster Baan_ ,” she cooed childishly, at odds with the harsh look in her eyes, “and several of your guild-buddies decided to start helping the invaders, I decided to start murdering you all to death.”

Tomik paused. “Baan and other lawmages are assisting the Dreadhorde,” he repeated softly. “You’re sure?”

His captive shot him a look that made Tomik think she was reassessing him. “Ye-ep,” she chirped, then frowned. “Well, helping the big dragon guy who came with them, so close enough.”

Tomik snarled, startling his guest. “Those…” He cut that off and kicked a nearby stool, then sighed and leaned back against the wall.

“I thought some lawmages were working with the Dreadhorde,” he said after a moment, “But I didn’t realize it was that far.”

“You really didn’t, did you,” Massacre Girl said softly, making him jolt from the voice’s closeness as he realized he’d accidentally let the bindings loosen in his anger. Looking up, he paused when he saw her standing just in a few feet in front of him, standing still with knife at her side.

“So,” she said, turning her back on him to walk back to his boards, and the maps and notes pinned to said boards. “Whatcha do’in then down in this basement?”

After a moment’s pause, Tomik took a step closer. Things were already weird enough, and he was running off little enough sleep that he was willing to made the stupid move of getting closer to the infamous killer. “I’m not the only one resisting the invasion,” he said. “Working with the other resistance forces, I’m putting movements of the enemy together to figure out where they’re going to strike, as well as where the actual collaborators are. We already lost one cell to collaborating Ravnicans giving their magic to the other side.”

His guest — guest? Too little sleep, and too little adrenaline left, so yea, guest; why not? — let out a hum. “Any giving you all distinct trouble?”

Shaking his head slightly and regretting the adrenaline rush falling away, Tomik took at few steps closer — ignoring the parts of his brain telling him he was insane and going to die — to point at a certain section of the map. “Here. I’m pretty sure its at least a lawmage of high enough authority to be messing with the district’s defense systems, as well as a Boros deserter or three, but with what you said there might be another lawmage or two there as well.”

Massacre Girl looked closer at where his finger was pointing. “I recognize that,” she chirped, a dark grin crossing his face. Turning to face him with a bounce, that grin went even wider, and Tomik started taking a step back in fear before she darted forward and—

“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of those nasty traitors for you!”

Tomik heard the words, and saw her slip from the room in a rush, but too much of his mind was stuck on the fact that one of the most notorious figures in recent years had found him, actually been captured for a few minutes, talked with him with no murder attempts, and then _kissed his cheek_.

After a few minutes of standing there, blinking blearily, Tomik swore, locked the door, and then headed towards the bed in the corner. If he was hallucinating like this, then who knew how he’d mess up his investigation if he kept going right now.

(Yea, that was it; nothing else.)

Sleep it was.


End file.
